Forgiveness 101

Forgiveness has to be the most misunderstood emotion of all. We wrongly believe that we can choose to forgive or not. In truth, we do not hold the power to decide whether or not we forgive someone. Neither does it mean that what happened is ok. Forgiveness is all about you.

It’s to help yourself. You don’t have to talk, trust, or be with the person you forgive either. The true meaning of forgiveness is when one accepts what has been done to them. To stop believing that what had happened can be changed or fixed. Here are some more facts about forgiveness.

Forgiveness Is Healthy

If you found it in your heart to forgive, you’ll enjoy a myriad of benefits. Before forgiveness, is all the hurt, pain, and anger. Once you forgive, you won’t dwell on what happened, and will finally be able to move on.

It can be hard to forgive someone, especially if they really hurt you. If you can’t forgive the offender, then you can forgive yourself. Since forgiveness takes a long time, gratitude might accelerate the process.

Don’t Force It!

Can’t picture yourself saying: “I forgive you”? Don’t sweat it. Keep in mind that it’s normal to feel anger or hurt if someone upset you. Besides, forgiving when you don’t feel it can be damaging. You’re suppressing your emotions and your pain. In other words, the pain can be so bad, that it’s impossible to forgive, but that’s ok.

Potential Downsides

Just like other emotions, this one can take a turn for the worst. You can become addicted to the feeling, or playing the victim. This could also make you addicted to the attention, trapping you in a vicious cycle. The person you’re forgiving might also commit what they did again, mistaking your forgiveness as a sign that they’re off the hook.

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